Female Forum

Hi,

I’m really at wit’s end. I just turned 40 this year and have taken the year off treating cancer. Now that I’ve finished all the treatments, I’m looking for work again (and anxious to work because I am surviving on my savings).

Unfortunately though, due to difficult circumstances, I have no higher education (not even a highschool diploma), and because of this, it is very difficult to find a good job. I had been cleaning houses for the past 6 years, but it was physically and psychologically draining and demoralizing to boot. I refuse to return (even out of desperation) to this type of work, because I feel I was made for better things.

However, the thought of extensive studies at the point is very daunting. I have always had a great affinity for the medical field, but I cannot gain acceptance into any programmes until I’ve completed a few highschool credits. I’m attempting to do some studies via distance education (the adult learning centres were full), and I’m discovering concentration and motivation is a big problem for me. I cannot focus on nor complete any of the courses.

I would be willing to do entry-level office work, but no one is hiring me with absolutely no experience.

I’ve gone to all the employment centres, but they provide minimal help.

An internship type of setting would be ideal for me, but such opportunities are also few and far between.

Any advice? Many thanks!

OK, do you mind if I ask if you are from the States or the UK?  Or have I completely guessed wrong regarding nationality?

It sounds like you have had a really tough time recently, and congratulations for coming out determined to do something different. 

Now, as far as education is concerned, it is never too late, I got my degree after the age of 40, so there is life in the old girl yet!!

I’d love to be able to suggest something, but I bet there are plenty of forum members who could come up with something equally sensible.  Any chance you’d be OK about filling a few more details on your profiles, nothing very revealing, just the briefest of outlines would help, or in a post if you feel happier like that.  Just remember, you only have to say what you feel like telling!

Hi,

Thanks for your response to my question! I live in Canada (Toronto), my parents are both quite highly-educated folks, but fell in with an odd religious group and under this influence refused to allow me to pursue the education to which I aspired during my youth. So I set myself out to try to be obedient to this religion and hoped to make up for everything by marrying and dedicating myself to raising children. But to this date I have failed to marry and now the cancer treatments have plunged me into early menopause.

I’ve worked as a nurses’ aide in a nursing home, have spent several years abroad working for a humanitarian organization (teaching ESL programmes to elementary-level children and have done considerable translation work- Russian to English). Since returning to Canada 6 years ago I have been rootless and unable to figure out what to do with my life. I was concentrating on finding a husband and having children, but failed, and instead fell ill with cancer. These 6 years have been times of great struggle and disappointment and the only work I was able to get was housecleaning, which completely demoralized and broke me as a person. It was difficult and horrifying to be subjected to intense societal disdain and consignment to the “servant class”. If ever I showed a glimmer of intelligence with my clients, I was promptly fired. I had to learn to play dumb. It has been a terrible nightmare.

I’m dealing with so much resentment and anger at having failed to find love and finding myself without even a decent job.

Any advice is well received. Many thanks!

Oh Cinnamon!  I had no idea of what you had been through.  Life is unfair, and nothing I can write can rewrite the past for you, and in all probability, if you had any sense you would not want me or anyone else to do that for you.  I think that there are lots of possibilities for you, but at the moment, you seem a little swamped by everything, which is very natural, and I would probably be swamped completely.  So, you have inner strength, even if you don’t yet allow yourself to see that, do you think?  I’m only making tentative guesses here.  Do keep posting on this or any other subject, though, because it can help, even the dafter, funny threads make me chuckle when life closes in on me occasionally, and believe I have my moments too.

OK, I’m going to put my thinking hat on and see if I can come up with anything which sounds sensible, so chat to you soon.  And do keep chatting on whatever subject you feel like, start a few arguments if you think you’d enjoy that too!!!!!

You have had it tough!

You mentioned you had an interest in the medical feild. I know what you mean about the lack of qualifications to get on to certain courses but if you were interested in being a medical receptionist or secretary you could do the AMSPAR course. I am doing this at the moment, it lasts for the best part of a year (if you have enough savings to carry you through for that long). Its an intensive but interesting course that gets your office skills up to date,you learn all the medical terminology and lots more. This gives you qualifications to go on to work in a hospital or any office job. I note that you are in canada, but as far as i know AMSPAR is a world wide thing(short for Association of Medical Secretaries,practice Administrators and Receptionists. If that sounds like your type of thing try and Google it for your area.

I knew someone else would come up with somthing sensible!  And there must be plenty of other distance learning courses over the internet, or possibly courses which you might prefer to attend in person.  Good old Google.  I still think Cinnamon is amazing coming through such trying experiences.

Have you thought about freelancing - at least temporarily? You mention you have skills in translating - I wonder if there are any opportunities you can find online from people looking for freelance translators? Have you given this angle any thought?

Thanks for all the good advice! I’ve thought of the medical secretary option-of course the pay isn’t great-but it’d be better than nothing certainly. I will definitely pursue this further.

Martin, I’ve considered the translation, and would love this field, but there are thousands of Russian immigrants in this city whose English-Russian translation skills are far superior to my own, so I’m not sure if I feel confident enough to pursue this angle. Naturally, I am stronger in English-my native tongue-and I fear most of the opportunities would be from English to Russian here.

Hiya
I forgot to give you think link, you might find some information on here that could be useful

AMSPAR

Dond’t forget, you can start off a medical receptionist in a clinic and go onto practice management in a GP surgery, or be a supervisor after a you’ve settled in, just a thought.