Many of us want to be successful. Maybe not just in our careers, but with our relationships, our parenting skills, our education or our spiritual life. Becoming and enjoying a successful life isn’t as hard as self-helps make it out to be.
There are only a few secrets out there - but they really aren’t secrets at all. They are common sense, but the type that has gone by the wayside as our lives have become faster moving, evolving and contributing to the ‘need-it-now’ society.
Here are a few tips for getting the most out of your life right now, and making it one step further to enjoying success.
Give up your excuses (ALL of them)
It’s easy to blame others for our problems, especially when at times they are responsible. However, if you want to be the type of ‘go to’ person that others count on when they need you, you must let go of all excuses. This includes those ‘explanations’ that you don’t think are excuses. Trust us, they are seen as excuses.
Even if, in your mind, there are legitimate reasons why something was said improperly, done incompletely or handled inappropriately, bite your tongue. You will get a lot further if you offer a simple, “I’m sorry, it will not happen again”. Put yourself in the position of the person accepting excuses over and over again: teachers, bosses, parents. Nobody wants to hear the reasons why your responsibilities were mishandled; they only want to know that you will do all you can to ensure it doesn’t happen again in the future.
Self confidence and self awareness
Part of success is taking the skills and abilities you do have and making the most of them. You need self-confidence in the things you are capable of, but you should also be self-aware of any character traits that need to be worked on.
If there are personality traits hindering your success, you are free to work on and change them at any time. Nobody is stopping you. If there are parts of you that you don’t like, but that you cannot possibly change, you will have to accept them and do your best with what you have. First of all though, you need to be aware of which innate qualities you can, and cannot, change. Make a list… you might surprise yourself with what you have to work with.
Change your reactions to life’s circumstances
Just as you must give up making excuses, you also need to stop the blame game. Blamers and complainers are nobody’s best friend. Successful individuals not only take responsibility for their situations, but they work hard to change them if they are not ideal. Sure, it’s easy to blame others. There’s your company you can blame if you lose your job and can’t pay your mortgage. You might complain about being lonely since your husband left you alone to raise your children. These situations are not ideal, but will blame and complaints make the situation any better? Of course not.
When a time in your life arises that is not happy or otherwise joyful, it’s easy to quickly react to the situation. Reactions are usually based on anger, bitterness, jealousy, fear and other negative emotions. Instead of reacting, try acting. What’s the difference? Acting requires you to sit down, formulate a plan and take action. You think about what you are going to do before you do it, and therefore it is usually a more rational approach. Reacting in the heat of the moment usually results in behaviour that you later wish you could take back.
Remember that you reap what you sow
In order to be successful in any area of your life, whether it be finances, relationships or school, it’s important not to burn the bridges you build. This means remembering the golden rule: treat others as you would like to be treated. Reaping what you sow means that if you plant seeds of mistrust, anger, jealousy or anything else that can grow into something unhealthy - it will do just that.
We all know that if we are starting out at the bottom of the food chain in business, we should be courteous, helpful, respectful, punctual and more. Those at the top of the food chain, quite honestly, can tend to forget these important points. They forget that even though they are at the top, they are still planting those seeds with every association they make and every contact they meet. Someday they may be in a position of needing those on the lower rungs of the ladder. Will they be willing to help someone who has been rude, inconsiderate and disrespectful? Probably not. So remember, no matter how successful you think you already are, you should still be mindful of planting good seeds wherever you go.
Recommended Reading
For more information and advice on being successful, take a look at the following books:
The Secret
Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us
How Successful People Think: Change Your Thinking, Change Your Life
What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful
100 Simple Secrets of Successful People, The: What Scientists Have Learned and How You Can Use It
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