After nine months of waiting, you have just returned home from the hospital with your new baby. You’ve read all the books and think you know everything you need to know in order to take care of your baby perfectly. Then things start to happen that you never expected. Suddenly you wish that your new baby had come with a user’s manual or instruction booklet. Every mother deals with some unusual discoveries about parenting, but there are some common issues that come up pretty often. While everyone’s experience varies with their children, these are some answers straight from the mouths of real moms.
1. The ‘experts’ are not always right.
Every mother and every child is different, so sometimes the suggested way to handle a situation will not work for everyone. Use your own instincts and take cues from your baby to find answers to your problems. Take their advice into consideration, but know that it certainly is not the law.
2. Sleep when your baby sleeps.
Naps are just as important for your healing body as they are for your baby’s growing one. Even if it means that the dishes are not washed or the laundry is not finished, get sleep whenever the opportunity presents itself. As most babies do not sleep through the night, any chance for sleep is important to your own health.
3. Though breastfeeding is a great, healthy choice for your baby, it is not the only way.
If you cannot or do not want to breastfeed, bottle fed babies can be healthy and happy. You should never feel guilty for doing what feels right and works well for you.
4. Holding your baby will not spoil them.
After nine months of close contact, your baby needs and wants to be close to you much of the time. Slings and front carriers can be a lifesaver if you have a baby that enjoys being held most of the time.
5. Take a nappy/diaper bag along, even if you are only running out for a minute.
If not, your baby will either decide he is hungry before his regular feeding time or there will be a messy, leaky nappy that will leave you running for home. At the least, take a diaper, wipes, bottle and change of clothes, in case of emergencies.
6. If your baby seems ill or if they are acting strangely, it is okay to call a doctor for advice.
It is better to ease your mind with a professional opinion of symptoms than to be worried and stressed on an already sleepless night.
7. Don’t try to do everything yourself, especially when you first come home.
There is no need to try to be superwoman. Ask for help when you need it and accept it when it is offered to you. You will be a better mother if you are rested and have time to care for yourself.
8. Write things down.
Even if you think at the time that you will never forget the date that your sweet little one took her first steps, months down the road the information will be long since gone. Start a baby book and update it regularly with milestones and photos.
9. Savour every laugh, every smile and every moment of your baby when they are growing up.
Before you know it, they will be independent and less reliant on you. Though the first months can feel like they will last forever, really they are gone in an instant.
10. There is no such thing as being a perfect mother.
All you can do for your children is love them and care for them the best you know how. Mistakes will happen; just try to learn from them and move on. If you spend too much time trying to be perfect, you will lose some of the most wonderful moments that you will have with your baby.
The first days of being a new mother are exciting and sometimes frightening, usually full of the unexpected. Remember that no one expects you to have all the answers; even mothers of several children do not always have the answers. The most important thing is to love your baby and to do your best to care for them properly. Do whatever works the best for the two of you and the rest of your family and no one can ask for anything more.
Recommended Reading
For more information and advice on being a new mother, take a look at the following books:
Baby Laughs: The Naked Truth About the First Year of Mommyhood
Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay: And Other Things I Had to Learn as a New Mom
Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby
The New Basics: A-to-Z Baby & Child Care for the Modern Parent
The Diaper Diaries: The Real Poop on a New Mom’s First Year
Join us
The best part of Female Forum is our community. Take a look at our forums and join the most welcoming and friendly online community around.
Share this article
Email Tweet This! Share on Facebook Stumble Digg Save to Delicious
If you enjoyed this article, you may like to subscribe to Female Forum. Subscribing is free and ensures you won't miss any future articles.
What do you think?
Discuss this article here, or chat about other topics in the forums.
By fooddiaryuser on 05 Nov 2009
Great advice here.
If you are in a situation that is causing you to gain weight or you want to control weight, consider using a daily food diary.
It will allow you to be aware of exactly how many calories you are taking in and will tell you when to stop or what to save for dinner/snack.
Yes, this is a great idea because it also allows you to see the balance between carbs and proteins. Also, for blood sugar levels you should balance them. For instance, if you eat only fruit for breakfast, that is too many carbs that cause your blood sugar to spike and then fall so you become tired. That can actually lead to weight gain over an above what is recommended for pre or post-pregnancy.
I know people don’t like to hear about beans, but, they are a great way to balance the carbs. Especially if there is not enough in the budget to buy a lot of beef, chicken or pork protein.
In a pinch, I ate ramen noodles with two eggs cracked into the chicken soup...its like your own Egg Foo Young. I like it boiled down and on the dry side.
Keeping a daily food diary is also a good idea for mothers-to-be because there is a place to mark down that you have taken your pre-natal vitamin. And, you are seeing how close you are to your limit of calories every day (so you know when to stop or cut back) and you track water. Water is sooooo important because dehydration is a no-no, especially if you are like me and had morning sickness all day/everyday until I gave birth.
I think it is important for Mothers to Be to know their daily calorie and water intake and to control weight gain.