The days of the school playground bully have changed. Instead of playground fights and demands for lunch money, bullies have taken things to a new level and if you’re not watchful, your child could be next.
Most Mums can recall their own childhood when they knew a child in school that was bullied and teased. In some cases, perhaps they were that child. Name calling, rough play, and daily taunting could bring a child to tears. Not much in terms of children being ridiculed, embarrassed and afraid has changed. However, the way kids are being bullied has. Today’s youth are being harassed through the Internet, social network and mobile technology that leave many Mums wondering how to protect and put an end to the new face of bullying.
The Internet Playground
The birth of the Internet has brought us many excellent ways of communicating. Blogs, social networking and newsfeeds allow us to keep in touch with what’s going on in each other’s lives and across the globe. Unfortunately with all the good information we also get a lot of bad information. Blogs allow us to speak our minds on everything from our families, local government and even people we don’t like. Tweens and teens are creating blogs about their schools and communities and they are not always using it for good.
Blogs disrespecting other students, saying hateful and mean things are cropping up everywhere on the Internet. As kids become more tech savvy they have also found ways to hurt and bash their classmates - all with a click and send attitude. Popular instant message programs allow real time bullying without ever having to face the victim. Social networking sites in which ‘friends’ are added and collected like stamps can make some feel left out and alone. They also subject themselves to falling prey to mean comments left on public pages for viewing by so called friends as well as strangers.
Harassment Gone Viral
Bullying doesn’t have to start with hateful words spread through instant messaging. In some cases, private emails or pictures taken with mobile phones are leaked to other students and the harassment spreads like wildfire. Girls willing to show racy pictures of themselves with boyfriends or crushes leave themselves open to having their dignity become vulnerable for the entire student body to see.
Out of Sight, Out of Mind
The ability to hit ‘Send’ and watch words or pictures vanish has given kids permission to say what they feel or do what they want without feeling as if it is really happening. By the early teens when bullying can heighten, kids haven’t yet developed the ability to completely think through their actions and once the instant message is sent or the email has disappeared from their mail, they don’t contemplate their actions.
It’s not only a lack of reality that kids are facing. Something about the Internet and its autonomy makes being able to say hurtful things or doing something to harm someone all the easier. There’s a mindset with the Internet that gives people the freedom and the bravery to say things they might not normally say face to face. Girls snapping scantily clad pictures of themselves with their phones and sending them to their boyfriends or their crush of the month do so because it’s only them and the mobile phone in the room. Would they normally behave this way if they knew the entire student body would be watching?
Uncharted Territory
The biggest challenge that parents and schools face is being able to shut down this type of bullying. For years, school policies have dictated that unless the bullying was done on school property, a school would or could do little about the situation. Unfortunately since most kids carry mobile phones with instant messaging capabilities and schools use computers with Internet access, they are finding that the bullies are still invading their classrooms but in more creative and subtle ways.
To combat harassment during school hours, many schools have instituted new policies that prohibit students from using school computers in malicious ways. Students and parents are required to sign an agreement stating that they will adhere to the school’s policies on the use of computers. Other schools have organised groups and assemblies that aim to teach kids about the implications of bullying and what to do if they are a victim. The truth is that many schools are not equipped to handle this new outbreak in bullying and are simply doing the best they can with each case presented to them.
At home it’s imperative that kids and parents keep lines of communication open and parents maintain a watchful eye on their child’s Internet usage and their mobile phones. If bullying is suspected, print any emails, and save a history of instant messaging so that it can be accessed later. Many Internet instant messaging programs have an option for keeping a history of instant message conversations. Depending on the severity of the harassment it may be necessary to inform the police in addition to the school and having hard copies of the bullying goes a long way towards putting an end to it.
Protecting kids is a parent’s number one priority but being able to keep them safe in a virtual world poses new challenges and complications. Being diligent in knowing what they are doing and talking openly to them are the two most important steps for making them feel safe in an unsafe world.
Recommended Reading
For more information and advice on online bullying, take a look at the book, ’Cyber Bullying Prevention: 50 ways to protect your child from online bullies with solutions to prevent or stop cyber bullying
Join us
The best part of Female Forum is our community. Take a look at our forums and join the most welcoming and friendly online community around.
Share this article
Email Tweet This! Share on Facebook Stumble Digg Save to Delicious
If you enjoyed this article, you may like to subscribe to Female Forum. Subscribing is free and ensures you won't miss any future articles.
What do you think?
Discuss this article here, or chat about other topics in the forums.