May 22, 2016 at 11:01 pm #10302
I thought it has been too long since someone has posted in this category.
So I figured I jump in and discuss this article I found in Esquire magazine called, 12 Things About Being A Woman That Women Won’t Tell You
I am curious how everyone feels about this article?
I found a few points that really struck home with me, like #6. FEAR
“We’re scared. We don’t want to mention it, because it’s kind of a bummer, chat-wise, and we’d really like to talk about stuff that makes us happy, like look at our daughters — and we can’t help but think, “Which one of us? And when?” We walk down the street at night with our keys clutched between our fingers, as a weapon. We move in packs — because it’s safer. We talk to each other for hours on the phone — to share knowledge. But we don’t want to go on about it to you, because that would be morbid. We just feel anxious. We’re scared. Given the figures, we can’t sometimes help but feel we’re just… waiting for the bad thing to come. Because that would be a realistic thing to think, and we like to be prepared. Awfully, horribly, fearfully prepared.”
But was disappointed with the her comment and generalization on #3. Periods:
“We’re still pretty traumatised about our periods, even though we’re now 40. Being a woman doesn’t make “being a woman” any easier. All that womb-shit is nuts. It’s like having an exploding, insane blood-bag of pain up in your business end — nothing really prepares you for when it all kicks off. One day, you’re just a kid on your bike. The next, you’re suddenly having to wedge a tiny Barbie mattress in your knickers, crying while you watch Bergerac, and eating Nurofen Plus like they’re Tic Tacs.
Men, imagine if, some time around your 12th birthday, some manner of viscous liquid — let’s say gravy — suddenly appeared in your pants, in the middle of a maths lesson. And then it turned up every month for the next 30 years. You’d be all like “NO!” and “WTF?!?!” and “SRSLY??? THIS????” That’s what we’re like, too. We’re not wise, or in touch with nature, or down with it. We’re just people with a whole load more laundry issues than you. Have you ever tried to scrub blood out of a Premier Inn sheet at 6am, using just travel shampoo and your toothbrush? It’s one of the defining aspects of being a woman.”
I don’t feel traumatized about getting my period. I think some of these categories she is trying to seem too cute. What are all your thoughts? Maybe we should write our own Female Forum – 12 Things About Being A Woman That Women Won’t Tell YouMay 23, 2016 at 6:18 am #64340
Being a woman isn’t entirely easy for me, either! Thankfully, I don’t suffer heavy periods. But being female does make you wonder if men have it easy. They don’t have to lie there for several hours, in agony, giving birth. Still, men have their problems, too. I wouldn’t swap gender, but womanhood can really suck sometimes!May 23, 2016 at 6:52 pm #64344
Lol I’m kind of traumatized I don’t get my period haha
No in all seriousness, I only every had a problem with my periods when I was younger. One, because I started really early and hadn’t known about periods beforehand, and two, they were so heavy when they came back as a later teen that I was constantly having to have iron shots – not fun.
1. I don’t actually agree with feminism. I’m so much more of a peoplist. People should be equal. Women ain’t better than men, we’re equal.
4. I don’t actually think we get that kind of pro-life demonstating here. At least not that I know of (having never had an abortion myself). A fair few of my friends from school/college have though. One thing I don’t like about it here though is the way hospitals are set up for abortions. I’m sure I’ve mentioned it before, but there should NOT be the same waiting room for a woman in labour, a woman who’s waiting on infertility treatment and a woman who is waiting on an abortion. Those three should be allowed the privacy of not feeling guilty/ sh*t about the other two.
6&9. I’ll definitely give you. It’s something I always found weird about my inlaws and vice versa; when I’m packing clothes and getting ready for the day I don’t just chuck stuff on. Not even when I’m staying in. I’m always thinking about comfort and practicality at the very least and usually how I appear too. It’s not nice to think about either, but girls always have to think about self-defence because we’re seen as easy targets. The irony of this being that between me and my husband, who has half a foot and a stone and a half on me, he’d look like the harder target but actually be the easier. My da made me start taking self-defence at 8! The boys (my nephews who grew up with me) only had to take it for two years. I had to continue til my teens!
Also, Amy Schumer; not funny, and my lady don’t get waxed. Just special occasions when I get ‘neatened up’. Can’t stand a smooth lady. Slightly odd but it makes me feel like a little girl, plus it massively increases your chances of getting a UTI and I’m avoiding them at all costs!
All in all I’m not entirely certain I agree with everything she said but there’s some of it that makes sense.May 25, 2016 at 10:05 pm #64352
Some of it does make sense some of it is so generalized. Which I guess is hard not to be so general when creating a list like this.
I think my list I would have to add something about:
Girls grow up being told they are pretty or cute. Boys are told they are clever or strong.May 26, 2016 at 5:22 pm #64354
She is a uk comedienne, she also wrote a book called “How to be a woman”, it was much the same as you are quoting, and not all that funny.June 10, 2016 at 12:02 am #64363
I didn’t realize she was a comedian. I didn’t really find her article funny?!?
Probably because when it comes to sharing a women’s perspective with a man, I can get really serious! Like don’t mess with me! I am a women hear me ROAR.
There are just so many rights and attitudes, I believe, we need to fight for.
Although, I wouldn’t be opposed to reading someones funny take on a list, 12 Things About Being A Woman That Women Won’t Tell You, I just hope they actually make me laugh and not just the guy. Or make him role his eyes!
Lately, I’ve been thinking about how when a women takes a lead or manages a group some might call her a control freak or bitchy. That is just unacceptable especially since if a man was in that role those words wouldn’t cross their minds.
This article did touch upon masturbating and I think there is no other way to get around that awkwardness about it? Maybe I am wrong. Maybe some of you don’t mind sharing those details with a man, I certainly wouldn’t judge but I would probably be giggling in the background.June 10, 2016 at 6:43 am #64365
Sharing with anyone, man or woman is all about circumstance.
I have told men some very personal stuff, it depends on the person rather than the sex. It is more likely to be to a woman though.December 22, 2016 at 7:18 pm #64898
I have told men some very personal stuff, it depends on the person rather than the sex
That is a truly astute observation.
My wife and I share everything–without exception.
I simply cannot imagine why some men say that they can speak of some things only with other men; or why some women say that they can speak of some things only with other women. It just makes no sense to me.
We are all [strong]humans[/strong] first; so it seems normal to me to sympathize, thoroughly, with the problems of another human (even if we do not experience all those same problems directly).January 22, 2018 at 10:15 pm #150865
- Okay, I agree with that as a feminist. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe we need gender equality and not a matriarch society, but it’s dumb to ignore the fact that society gives so much value to masculine traits instead of the feminine ones. Saying “feminism” makes it clear that we should cultivate femininity within every human being, even men. I know this is not related to the origins of the word, that’s just how I justify my use for it.
- Well, if you feel offended by the “men do this and that” thing, it’s probably because you are doing something wrong. Don’t worry, I try to not generalize when I make such statements towards patriarchy.
- It’s true, many girls are traumatized by it and I’m honestly looking for ways to stop periods forever even if I don’t get biological children anymore.
- I agree.
- I don’t know how true that is, but let us women speak when we want to without feeling threatened by our opinions/presence. Geez.
- Okay, that happens a lot and it’s annoying as hell. Please, guys, try to be more… human with us. Don’t act like we’re walking sex toys.
- I talked to some guys about it and I regret it most of the time. I’m not trying to date you when we get into this kind of conversation, okay? Also, don’t cut us out from your dating possibilities because of that. We all know you love doing this as much as women do.
- It’s true for some of us… Not me. I just do things like that because I’m forced to.
- Trust me when I say that I try to keep my hope that male feminists are a thing, the issue is my interactions with males.
11/12. I don’t know what to say. HahaJanuary 23, 2018 at 9:00 am #150961
Being a woman can be hard at times but generally a lot of guys are coming round to the fact we are all equal. You still have the die hard knuckleheads who treat women as ” sex toys and slaves ” but hopefully in the future that will change too. I love being who I am and try to indulge my femininity as much as possible.January 23, 2018 at 1:28 pm #150985
I agree, mikki. men do often realize we are all equal. Gender should not affect career choices or intelligence and skills. Britain has a prime minister who is female: that is the right foot forward. There will always be men who look down on women in positions of power, but they are not worth anyone’s time or attention. Every woman should be treated with respect.January 23, 2018 at 5:27 pm #151005
I remind you Kitty, Britain has a Queen too and I admire her greatly. Last time in London I visited the palace and took a tour through the Queen’s closet. My God, her hat collection would put John Locke to shame. He’s of course the hatter in Mayfair.January 24, 2018 at 12:38 am #151164
I too went round the palace it was magnificent but did not see in her closet. I also think it is unfair to snipe at our female Prime Ministers about their choice of outfit, it is so wrong to judge us this way. When did anyone say David Cameron’s suit did not show off his best features or even ” his handbag was totally the wrong colour , or ” his heels were unsuitable for the occasion “. This does make me mad sometimes.January 24, 2018 at 3:26 pm #151340
well of course mikki, women put much more care and thought into what they wear than men do. I doubt David Cameron even realizes which suit he is wearing, and I’m sure he wears the same tie with a particular suit- and its probably one that his wife picked. So its natural to notice what a woman wears. And most women coordinate their underthings with their dress- do you think a man gives a thought about his skivies.January 24, 2018 at 5:00 pm #151397
I have always been impressed by what the queen wears, even though my choices may well be completely different. Other times too I am impressed by the clothes some politicians wear. Others not so much 😄
As the best approach for any public figure is likely to be creating the ideal image and gain advantage, I do wonder how many of them take professional advice. I suspect it would not go down too well with any high level formal meeting, especially international, if one went too scruffy. A diplomat / wife would likely form her opinion. I wonder how Boris Johnson is viewed, in private, on the continent.