June 24, 2019 at 1:04 pm #202115June 24, 2019 at 9:38 pm #202136
@schala: I agree. We should cooperate together. The problem is, there are too many individuals in this world who are selfish, who don’t cooperate but rather, only look out for themselves. And I’m sorry to say but it seems that more men fit this description than women do. And this book confirmed this. When I was reading it, I was thinking: “Yeah, this is what I observe almost on a daily basis.” Yes, of course there are many men who aren’t prejudice, who don’t use women then toss them aside, etc., but there are too many who do.
This book doesn’t go against men. It just points out characteristics that men often represent.
Overall, women are better/stronger. It’s not a complex. The book gives examples throughout it why this is true. It has nothing to do with feminism or downgrading the male species. It’s just facts. And statistics prove it. For example, women commit less crimes than men. (How many women do you know rape men and children?)
Women have tried to live harmoniously with men since the beginning of time. But there won’t be harmony as long as so many men feel they’re entitled to abuse, harass, bully, etc. women, expect more from women than men, criticize women for doing a quarter of what men do (if women do anything at all), etc. In other words, treat women unfairly.
I think it’s a given that we mustn’t neglect this “weakness” in men and boys. That’s what I got from the book.
The book mentions: “…mothers will (sadly) often raise their sons to be tough and strong and not show emotion…” And of course, when mothers do this, they just make the situation worse.
And even the last line of the book says: “…in the hopes that it will eventually bring about change for the better, for everyone.”
I’ve read all the opinions on this thread and they are neither unfair nor prejudiced against men. The ladies are just explaining what they’ve also observed.
If any woman has had bad experiences with men abusing their power and/or their upper body strength (and I think you’d be hard pressed to find any woman who hasn’t been abused/sexually harassed by a guy at some point in her life), their experience just confirms what the book says.
Every woman I’ve spoken to agrees with and can relate to what is written in this book. It’s guys who seem to have a problem with it (and I can understand why). Some men have responded quite drastically (and if the situation were reversed, I can just hear a guy telling a woman: “Oh, don’t get so emotional”) but yet a guy can react so harshly (for example, when Steven says: “…I hope you die, Josette!” to the author, at free-ebooks.net/psychology/Are-Men-the-Weaker-Sex) and no one says anything.
The book specifically states that what is written doesn’t apply to all men. This generalization; “all men”, “all women”, etc. is a characteristic I find more in men, than in women. You yourself have made this generalization. Is it possible that you’re a guy (who’s pretending to be a woman so you can join this forum)?June 24, 2019 at 11:56 pm #202141
I’m not sure my answer will be very well received but discussion is about honestly exploring things, not just agreeing so everyone can feel good, so I’m going to have to offer up this thought.
Physiologically speaking women have been endowed with a lot of genetic traits that support the important job of bearing and raising children. But, I believe it’s very complicated to assign one sex as being “stronger” since that’s not a well-defined word. There are definitely documented things such as: women tend to have a higher pain threshold than men (Thank goodness!! Childbirth and all…)
I do believe that there are traits both genders have developed into strengths over the centuries through evolution and social constructs.
I’d like to believe that as women break free of social restrictions men will become more comfortable with accepting that all humans are equal, regardless of race, gender….etc. Less competition, more collaboration or the world is destined to go BOOM.June 25, 2019 at 5:39 am #202148
Men are obviously physically stronger. I believe women are emotionally stronger and can handle life’s problems easier than men. women can control men easily to do what they want more often than not. children will favor mom over dad due to their mental stability
1 member liked this post:June 27, 2019 at 8:44 pm #202226
@cindiaugustine: I hope you’re right, that men will become more comfortable with accepting that all humans are equal, regardless of race, gender, etc. But after reading this book, I wouldn’t be surprised if it doesn’t happen.
There was a “women’s liberation movement” (where women broke free of social restrictions) in the 1970’s but there still seems to be so much abuse from men, so many decades later. A lot of prejudice is passed down from generation to generation (which would explain why all humans aren’t treated equally and respected).
As someone said (when asked what can be done regarding the weaknesses that so men seem to have), the best thing to do is; inform young women so they’ll know what characteristics to look for/recognize when dating, looking for a significant other, and avoid having children with men who probably wouldn’t make good fathers, who would possibly raise children in a dysfunctional home environment. Women would then possibly chose emotionally healthy men to have a relationship with (which is better for the woman) and hopefully those men would make better fathers. Their children would hopefully grow up in a loving family where they could be emotionally and psychologically nurtured and wouldn’t be so abusive toward their wives/girlfriends and children.
In all fairness, the book does mention that men have upper body strength and that the examples given (where men are “weaker”) is generally speaking.
What traits have men developed into strengths over the centuries through evolution and social constructs besides what is mentioned in the book?
1 member liked this post:June 27, 2019 at 11:06 pm #202230
I definitely remember the “women’s lib” movement. As a young adult at the time I did my share of attending (Canadian) marches etc,. LOL I have to agree I really did think we would have made more progress than we did – which is pretty minimal! But it’s not realistic to think that men, after centuries of being in charge, would give up the seat of power easily. All we can do is keep fighting. Moving slowly through mud is better than standing still in quicksand, as frustrating as it is.
1 member liked this post:June 28, 2019 at 7:40 am #202237
In making the roles equal I think we women in our role as mothers have a lot to answer for. I have married children and both spouses are hopeless in the house my DIL couldnt boil and egg because her mother said she wanted her children to remain children for as long as possible so at 20 she had no idea how to use a washing machine or do a weekly shop and when she had her baby my son had to teach his wife to change nappies!
My son inlaw has two left hands my daughter does all the DIY in the house and is gradually teaching him some skills , he is really proud that he learned enough to install their new cooker hob.
I have two sons one daughter they all learned cleaning, cooking, washing, and basic DIY including bike repairs and how to use power tools etc.
Yet when I went to a toy shop a year or two ago to buy something for my grandchildren I found one wall of dark blue black and grey toys designed for ‘boys’ mini guns, mini bulldozers, construction kits and cars. On the other wall in pastel colours of pink lilac and yellow were the ‘girls ‘toys dolls , household items in miniture a hoover, irons, washing machines and shop tills as if a female is destined for nothing more than household chores and menial shop work plus the dressing up clothes batman, superman, the avengers, for boys and for girls mermaids, fairys and witches re-enforcing the idea that men are superheros and women are either sex objects or hags.
If we as mothers break the social stereotyping of our children the chances of equality happening are much more likely to be sooner rather than later.June 28, 2019 at 4:52 pm #202244
@rabbithabit: Men usually have upper body strength but other than that, I think women are usually stronger (even physically, at least according to the book).
I think, generally speaking, a woman can control a man (due to her intellectual strength) when he’s not an abuser/controller/manipulator himself.
The problem is when one person (either a man or a woman) tries to control the other. In a healthy relationship, neither should try to control, boss, bully, etc. the other.
But too often, men aren’t strong enough to control their own behavior so they try to control those around them, to make up for their lack of self control.
This is one of the reasons so many women in the world have to be covered from head to foot when they go outside their home: because men, too often, can’t/don’t exercise self control!June 29, 2019 at 8:21 pm #202253
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Overall, women are better/stronger. It’s not a complex.
Isn’t it? You’re basing facts on an opinion of some woman who wrote a book about what she thinks, and decided that because you and other women agree with her then obviously she’s right?
I’m not really argue over this, especially because you think I’m a guy because I do not believe women are “stronger/better”. I do believe we’re equal. Is it really so hard wrap your mind over this? It’s up on the individual rather than what gender you were brought into this world. There are many factors that decide what a “better person” means, its also up on the individual and his/her interpretation on this word, because ” a better person” can be interpreted differently to each one of us. To some, a better person is someone who got a higher education, to others its being a good mother, etc.
Simply deciding that we’re better because nature made us naturally with less testosterone doesn’t mean that men are like wild monkeys that can’t control themselves. You sound like a religious zealot.
Men are naturally more aggressive. There’s no doubt about that. But because of that, they can be more assertive, direct, decisive. It depends on the individual how they use their stronger traits, not on the genitals. Same with women.
All I saw in this topic are women criticizing men, but not once did I see someone criticizing women, as if we’re all born perfect, right?June 30, 2019 at 9:26 pm #202266
My two cents: This “book” is basically an opinion piece, poorly written by an obviously young woman, derived from personal observations/experiences. Do I agree with it? No.
We all have talents/skills to offer the world. Nobody, male or female, is superior…even though some think otherwise…mostly the ones who think they are above all others.
However, it does make for good conversation on this board. In that respect, it served its purpose.July 1, 2019 at 10:08 pm #202301
@schala: I’m basing what I said on what I’ve observed (long before I ever read this book). That’s why I liked this book so much. It confirmed what I’ve seen all my life. It’s not just the author’s opinion because she gives examples to confirm/validate what she said, to confirm that women are generally stronger than men (even though we’re almost brainwashed, as a society, into believing that women are the weaker sex). So I’m glad this book was written, to confirm that we’re not the weaker sex, that we’re not second class citizens that should be treated like property to be used and abused.
I don’t know whether you’re a guy or not but I wouldn’t be surprised if you are, based on what you wrote. Because what you wrote is something I’d expect a man to say. But I never said you were a guy. I said:
@schala: Is it possible that you’re a guy (who’s pretending to be a woman so you can join this forum)?
Also, when you distorted what I said (when you wrote):
…especially because you think I’m a guy…
, you exhibited a characteristic that a lot of men have.
It’s easy to “wrap my mind around” facts. The fact is, men and women aren’t equal. We’re not the same. Women (overall) conduct themselves better than men. As I said, in this thread, how many women do you know who go around molesting children and sexually harassing people? Yet hardly a week goes by that some male celebrity/public figure isn’t accused of/charged with inappropriate sexual behavior. You can ask any cop. They’ll tell you that men break the law more than women.
And the list goes on and on.
As the book said: “… as always, the personality traits mentioned in this book are generalizations – there are always exceptions to the rule and ultimately everyone is an individual.”
Gender does play a part in this. I know nurses who work in neonatal intensive care and they confirm what the book said: premature girls have a better survival rate than premature boys.
This book (and the women on this thread) aren’t male-bashing. We aren’t putting men down/criticizing them because they may not be as strong as women above the neck; mentally, psychologically, etc. or even physiologically (scientists say that women are generally able to fight off disease better than men). It’s just that we as a society need to realize what was explained in the book. But there is still a general perception that women are somehow less than men, inferior to men, not worthy of basic human rights as men, etc.
The book doesn’t say that women are “better” than men. It only says that:
– women generally have better memories;
– women generally have better manners;
(which I, and every woman and most men I’ve spoken to about this, have seen over and over again).
Men, too often, either aren’t strong enough (or don’t want) to control themselves. That’s why so many men lose their temper, abuse their wives and children, commit crimes, etc.
I’m just stating facts. Don’t take my word for it, ask professionals. So how can I be a zealot? And what does this have to do with religion?
People can be a assertive, direct, and decisive without being aggressive. Aggression is a sign of weakness, of fear of losing control/an argument. And unfortunately, too many men use their weakness (aggression) to get their way.
All I saw in this topic are women criticizing men, but not once did I see someone criticizing women…
Well, that’s a switch! I usually hear men criticizing women but not criticizing men for doing a lot more!
No one is born perfect (and no one is saying otherwise). So once again, you’re saying something that isn’t true/accurate. Are ya sure you’re not a guy, cos that’s what I notice a lot of guys do. :-))
But because you have misquoted me, unfairly accused me, etc., I can’t help but think you might be an argumentative troublemaker. (I’ve found quite a few on social media/forums. I suspect some people don’t have anything more important to do with their lives.) So if you respond to my post, I won’t read it. My lack of reply won’t indicate my agreement with what you have said.July 6, 2019 at 12:43 am #202383
@TestDummyCO How is it poorly written? I liked the almost outline format. It was easy to read, unlike so many books that take pages and pages to say something that could be put into a paragraph or two. 😄
I could relate because I’ve observed (and fortunately didn’t experience too much of) what I found in the book. It was nice to know I wasn’t the only person who observed what she wrote.
It’s not her opinion because she gave examples to prove what she said was generally true. If she had only said: “women are the stronger sex”, then it would have been her opinion (and she would have been generalizing, which is usually not a good thing).
Why don’t you agree with what she wrote?
The author didn’t say we all don’t have talents/skills to offer the world.
She also didn’t mention anywhere in the book about anyone being superior. She didn’t even use that word. (I know, I just did a search and find – and didn’t find it. 😄)
A lot of guys think they’re superior, and act accordingly. That’s one of the problems between the sexes. There are too many men who think they’re more entitled, and think women are to be used for their own pleasure.July 6, 2019 at 7:30 pm #202395
You are too biased so I won’t argue with you. I can understand why women fight like this, its because they are too fed up being treated as a lower human. But I have a more scientific view over things. Mother Nature invents things in her plane, in a way that there will always be some kind of an equilibrium. Without order, or some kind of stability, things won’t last.
Mother nature invented a man and a woman. We’re ying, men are yang. Together, we’re whole.
There’s no “stronger than the other”; both need each other, because we’re different from one another.
There’s a reason why most inventors are men. Because they are naturally less prone to listen to laws, they take more risks than women. Women are naturally more obedient, we prefer to take less risks, and we tend to take more the “safe road” but in that mindset, you’re basically closing your own mind to new possibilities that were infront of you but you ignored them.
You say that men break laws statistically more than women; I agree with you, but that’s because men take risks more. Sometimes its worth it, and sometimes its not; and no, I’m not talking about sexual harassment. I’m more talking about the business stuff. But, there’s nothing we can do about the sexual harassment and violence. With great things, come the worst things. That’s how laws of nature are.
I am a 30 year old woman, and I tended the university (science related) and I can tell you that people like you, who say such stuff, will not only be ignored, but also laughed upon.
As long as science didn’t give proof that female brains are better than male’s, I won’t agree to anything that you have to say. You’re a typical woman who has real insecurity issues, and decided that the whole blame is on men and how men made you feel. Instead of pointing fingers on 1 gender, try to understand where your insecurities come from and deal with them.
For me the stigma of women vs men is exactly like the stigma of black people vs white people. Because of how society made us think, and how it mind controlled us, doesn’t mean that Mother Nature made us so insignificantly unfair.
As I said before; I have a more scientific view of things. It doesn’t mean I am a man; it simply means I am neutral because I think fighting about what gender is stronger is stupid. I think that men who think that women are lower than them are stupid, and vise versa For me these people are ignorant.
So, if you have an awesome idea to invent something, and you’re coincidentally a female, ignore your initial thought, that “your idea is stupid, It’s not going to work” etc, and have some “balls” and just do it. Because we live only once, what’s there that you really have to lose? Just do it (:
And yes, I believe you are ignorant to your surroundings because I simply cannot believe that this is all you saw from men. It’s what you wanted to see from men. It’s a big difference.
Oh and btw, the reason for my low level English is because its not my first language. I don’t live in the US. So sorry about that.July 7, 2019 at 7:01 am #202400
Things are getting a bit heated! Lets all calm down and not get into a fight. It’s like playing a game of ‘Rock, Paper, Scissors’ and someone trying to batter the paper with the stone. As such another way to look initially at the situation or process is those who is involved. Yes there are situations when men are stronger and others which most wouldn’t even contemplate so are weaker by default. There are exceptions to any rule.
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