December 26, 2019 at 2:57 am #206302
Hello, I am in the greatest confusion ever in my life. I am a married 12+ yrs, CHRISTIAN women that recently became attracted to another women at my job. has anyone else found herself in such a situation? I feel lost.December 26, 2019 at 10:06 am #206306
Forget the Christian bit. Thats a side issue really.
What is it about this woman that makes her so different? Think about it, is she reflecting something that you admire or desire (not sexual) we are often drawn to people because they make us feel secure happy safe , they give us a feeling of comfort confidence or just happiness.
Look at whats going on at home, is this woman showing you something youre missing at home, a little attention or a feeling of being wanted that you are just lacking? Or is she very overtly gay and is that making you feel curious or excited at the naughty thought of what could be?
Try to work out what the reason for this sudden feeling is before you go any further. Id say 90% of the time its something other than sexual and just something about the person that stirs an emotion in us that we need or miss.
- This reply was modified 3 months ago by cassandra.
1 member liked this post:December 26, 2019 at 1:44 pm #206313
It isn’t a crime to fancy another woman! You’re not alone in this situation. A LOT of women have feelings of attraction to other women. Whether you’re Christian/Muslim/Hindu/the colour purple* liking another person of the same sex is nothing to be sorry for. Just look at the LGBT movement! You’re not going against the lord by finding another woman attractive: no matter what the bible “says”**. You are a human being and aren’t “damned” or “evil” for these feelings. Never let anyone convince you that you’re committing some kind of crime. God loves love and doesn’t punish anyone for their feelings.
This is rather Pro-K.D Lang, but it is true. You are normal and don’t need to worry about your soul. Because religion should never be an issue when it comes to loving someone. Being Christian should not affect your morality: you are not an immoral Christian.
*or even the alien in the back garden!
**which can often be twisted to fit whoever reads it for their own needs. The bible has been interpreted in many ways.
1 member liked this post:December 27, 2019 at 1:27 pm #206343
I find attraction a funny thing. Mainly men, but sometimes women. It’s not something to be afraid of. It can mean a good friendship after the initial highly emotional feelings have worn off. It’s being true to your marriage while holding any deep feelings at bay during this period which can be tricky.December 28, 2019 at 3:58 pm #206357
wow all of you have offered great insite… you are all guiding me through different views. Thank you so much for your input. No I just saw her and it hit me. I didn’t even hear her talk. she has a strong character and so do I. she isn’t drop dead hot either. it’s just her. Idk how to explain it. Like I have a desire to care and protect her. Show her love but not in a sexual way. I feel like she needs it. So differently this is common and in just learning this…
I spoken to a few and it’s common. You grow everyday. As I have gotten to know her I’ve learned that I have the ability to sense and become in tune with the needs of another person.
it’s not necessarily a sexual attraction. maybe like a friendship.
have any of you been here? or gone through this or similar? how did that end up?
TIAJanuary 6, 2020 at 2:07 pm #206561
Do you feel you want to be romantically intimate with her? Your last post doesn’t sound that way to me, but reminds me of maternal types of feelings I’ve had for other women. I think other women have also had those types of feelings for me, I’ve had older women who have sort of “protected” me and such, and treated me almost like a daughter.
I’m Catholic, and I can’t say I’ve ever found another woman sexually attractive. I get a lot of people feel same-sex attraction, and I don’t have a problem with it, but I just don’t understand it. I’ve never fantasized about a woman in that way, and I just can’t imagine myself ever doing so.
I really do have a sense, especially from what you last said, that your love seems more maternal. Do you have children? There’s nothing wrong with loving another woman, I wish more of us would do so. We need to love and support each other.