It's starting already!!!!!

Female Forum Forums Category Related Discussion Love & Relationships It's starting already!!!!!

This topic contains 12 replies, has 7 voices, and was last updated by  AmyJane 2 years, 6 months ago.

Viewing 13 posts - 1 through 13 (of 13 total)
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  • #10084

    April from September are hard months for me in terms of friends and social media. Last year I had to deal with my sisters wedding and her constant posting of pictures, including the annoying hand selfie when she got her official engagement ring.

    Already, this year is getting off to a bad start. People constantly send updates about their new boyfriends, fiancees, wives and husbands. I always try to be polite, but after 5 years of going through this stuff it gets pretty old and after awhile saying congrats feels a bit fake and hollow.

    It’s not like I’m staying single on purpose, unfortunately i am almost 49, and quality men don’t notice me like they did before. The ones that do are usually way too young or too old. Men my own age pretty much look through me like I’m invisable.

    The thing that annoys me though is that while they get to post all their pictures and share all their gushing news nobody celebrates me, the one who is still waiting.

    Social networking is the absolute worst for this kind of stuff. I went offline just to see if the situation would improve or if anyone would notice I’m gone and it just got worse. i’m thinking of ditching my old Facebook account and starting a new one but only allowing family members and friends whose status is single on it. I would just block all of my partnered friends, but it would take too long to delete them.

    Is it wrong for me to feel slighted because of this stuff. Also, would I be out of line if I told these people to shut up!!!! I am so digusted by how people behave about making stuff public if I do find someone I’m not posting pictures, or changing my status or anything!!!

    #62539

    Have a (((HUG))) 🙂

    #62543

    Wow, take care, and why do you feel that men your age look through you? Where do you work, have you thought of meeting men at work? What is your profession, do you seek men in like fields, related fields?

    #62548

    Have a (((HUG))) 🙂

    Thanks I could use one.

    To the other poster, I would never date a person from my workplase even if it were an option. That’s too messy, especially if things go south.

    My town isn’t super huge, i see guys out and about all the time but they always seem to have a girlfriend in tow or a ring.

    People bug me to try OK Cupid or POF but I don’t like the idea of guys contacting me wanting casual hookups or just wanting someone to hang out with, or worse, just contacting me so that they can sexually harass me. I’ve dealt with enough of thatt just using normal social media. The minute they see the word single in your profile they IM you wanting you to call even if you don’t know them. it’s weird.

    I’ve been looking at online dating options where they cater to people who are looking for more serious relationships, not the nonsense that goes on on the paid sites like E-Harmony or Match, but I haven’t found anything in the US that offers anything promising. I had one person suggest Christain Mingle, but I’m not Christain so I don’t think that would work, plus I’d feel real bad about leading some nice guy on ond then hitting with the fact that I’m Taoist.

    My best hope right now is to use the power of positive thinking to manifest potential partners. Mine is the type of location where lots of people leave but not alot of new people move in. Or relocating, but financially that’s not really a good option.

    #62551

    I made a few friends on music sharing sites. I also know people who got married through the same sites. There was guy in my group, Paul, he went form here, uk, all the way to Canada. I get an ecard most xmases, he is happily settled down.

    #62558

    Wow, it looks like you live in a relatively small town. So the pros and cons is that everyone knows everyone. So, I guess you know who to avoid and who is a match. My best regards and wishes of luck. Hug, hug…

    #62566

    I think having a positive attitude (as your best hope) would be the way to go…being negative is not possibly a date-magnet if you know what I mean. I believe there is a “lid for every pot” so don’t loose heart… You will meet your man in shinning armor when you least expect to…. xx

    #62571

    That’s a great expression. 🙂

    #62579

    I feel your pain. I’m single, too and it doesn’t get any easier. Have a hug and know you’re not alone in this.

    #64232

    I feel your pain. I’m single, too and it doesn’t get any easier. Have a hug and know you’re not alone in this.

    Right now I’m focusing on new interests. As for social media and friends I try not to let their announcements bother me. Valentines Day bugs me, but then i remind myself I can love myself and be okay.

    I’m also feeling better about being single now that I have seen my sister’s marriage transition out of the honeymoon stage. I have decided I am not prepared to settle for 2nd best or less than and that takes time.

    #64233

    I wouldn’t say it’s unfair. It just is what it is. It kills me when I see parents out with their kids – especially when they don’t seem to actually be caring for them – and it kills me when I see everyone around me dropping kid after kid.

    It just is what it is. You need to find your own way of being ok with it. If you’re not willing to try sites online (like match.com or harmony) and you’re not getting yourself out there in the wider world for whatever reason, then you’re going to have to accept that it might never happen, and find a way to truly feel ok with that.

    It aint easy, but hell, I’ll tell you how when I figure it out myself!

    #64237

    I wouldn’t say it’s unfair. It just is what it is. It kills me when I see parents out with their kids – especially when they don’t seem to actually be caring for them – and it kills me when I see everyone around me dropping kid after kid.

    It just is what it is. You need to find your own way of being ok with it. If you’re not willing to try sites online (like match.com or harmony) and you’re not getting yourself out there in the wider world for whatever reason, then you’re going to have to accept that it might never happen, and find a way to truly feel ok with that.

    It aint easy, but hell, I’ll tell you how when I figure it out myself!

    Honestly, I don’t get it either.

    #64276

    Don’t forget that people on social media only let you see what they want you to see, it’s not reality.

    You don’t see the day to day dull stuff, where they’re arguing or feel like they’re being taken for granted. There are probably lots of people who wish they had your freedom, freedom to go where you want, when you want and to only answer to yourself. Everyone wants what they can’t have.

    i think you need to start a more positive relationship with yourself, which sounds a bit like hippy nonsense, but you need to stop looking and go out and find things you enjoy doing, like an evening class which again sounds like such a cliche but at our ages we have our jobs and our circle of friends, it’s hard to meet new people and who wants to go out with someone who comes and chats you up in a pub? not that they do, like you say, after a certain age men look through you.

    But don’t give up on dating sites, I know plenty of people who’ve found someone on one. I met my partner on twitter, we both write and got chatting.

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