Relationship problems

Female Forum Forums General Discussion General Chat Relationship problems

This topic contains 20 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  rabbithabit 5 months, 1 week ago.

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    I don’t think I’m hot enough for my man… 🙁


    Steph, remember the more information you supply will enhance quality of our responses. short vague words make responses difficult and error prone. dump your woes to us

    1 member liked this post:

    Yes, this is sounds more like sounding off at a stressful point than a request for ideas or answers.


    I feel like I know what his type is and I don’t look anything like that. It gives me anxiety and really hurts because he is exactly my type and I’m so in love with him. I think about bringing another girl into my relationship hoping that will make him happy and to get him out of his depression he’s in but I’m scared he will end up liking her more than me.

    Does anyone have any experience with bringing a girl in their relationship? If so, was it good for the relationship or did it destroy it? (I know that’s a pretty personal question)


    Oh Stephy, I’m so sorry you’re in this situation.  Sometimes I don’t know if there’s anything you can really do; I had a boyfriend who was going through a depression, and nothing I did worked, my relationship with him ended up turning pretty toxic and I had to end things.

    I’m so sorry, I can’t advise you on bringing someone else into your relationship, but if you’re not enough for him then I don’t think he’s right for you.  Your man should love you so that you’re all he needs, if he can’t give you that then you might not be having a balanced relationship, and that’s only going to bring you lots of pain.  Guys like to do this to us, to make you feel you’re lucky to be with him but not good enough, so he can string you along and take what he wants from you.  He might seem like he’s your type, but you deserve better.

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    You can’t be someone you’re not: and if you’re not hot enough for your boyfriend, then he isn’t worth your time or effort. He should love you for you: not expect you to be taller/have longer hair/be slimmer/etc. There is a whole checklist of what a man wants in a woman, but the reality is everyone is human. You don’t have to look perfect to be sexy for your boyfriend. If he demands you do, then maybe you’re with the wrong man. I know how you’re feeling, but you need to work on your confidence within yourself, rather than copy some photo of a model.

    I don’t mean to sound condescending, but – again – you can’t be someone you’re not. Of course, it is right to look sexy and make yourself sexy, but if you’re using a checklist, such as I have mentioned, then you’d be better off with someone else. Because you ARE hot and I am sure everyone knows it. Feel good about who you are: not what you should be.


    How are things now, Stephy08?


    well…things are bad, he thinks im the devil and im scared to leave bc i love him too much…


    i respect u for asking bc i have no friends at all xox


    I am not scared of him… im scared he doesn’t want me and love me anymore.  but my question is… ? y does he stick around?


    I am sorry you’re running low in the friends department: it is very difficult when you’re in such a position. And having doubts your boyfriend wants and loves you is difficult, too. But you’ve still got your friends & family around you . I think having your path blocked is why you’re without friends. I think breaking away from your boyfriend – even only for a day – would help get your mojo back. Because relying solely on your boyfriend to validate you is bad news. Your boyfriend should be great but you had a good life before him, too: why should you give that up just because you’re in a relationship with him? Spread your wings and fly, as corny as that sounds.

    Then your boyfriend will be reminded as to why he fell for you in the first place.


    I hope you’re alright now, Stephy08. Did any of our advice help in any way?


    He came to me and told me how much he loves me….  Im too trusting… last night he came and got mad at me bc a girl left a msg on his cell phone . He showed me bc he thinks its me calling a call girl but it wasnt. if its not him then y would he show me if hes telling the truth? Am i crazy????  I dont know what to think.


    I think there is only so much advice we can offer: you have to be honest with yourself about what YOU want in a relationship. You’re only crazy if you think you are. Maybe you are too trusting, but he should still respect you. However, you’re still young and have your whole life ahead of you. You decide what bed you want to lie in, so to speak. He may say he loves you, but that doesn’t mean he does. Love needs to be deeper than the odd tumble in the bedsheets. Yes, you find him attractive, but is that enough? I don’t want to flog a dead horse, but you decide whether to trust him and you decide your boundaries around men.

    Be honest with yourself and put yourself first.


    it is very chancey for you to bring a girl into your relationship . you should discuss an open relationship with your partner where he can date other women without destroying your relationship with him. again very dangerous but workable. from some of your comments he seems opposed to cheating and seems to love you exclusively

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