Time: Love or Hate?

Female Forum Forums General Discussion General Chat Time: Love or Hate?

This topic contains 10 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  KitKatKitty 4 months, 4 weeks ago.

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    Time is inevitable: therefore there is no choice but to move with time. BUT it solves problems and causes them at the same time.

    For instance, I did not do as well at school as I would’ve liked to, looking back. But I had night classes to increase my knowledge and skills – in various subjects – and I really worked hard in those classes. And, to that end, I got loads of qualifications and now have two jobs. But I loved my night classes. And, even though part of me is glad they’re over, another part of me wants to be back there.

    Also, you live your life by the clock: doing various activities and take achievement and whatnot from them. But then those activites are over and you’re left with nothing to do. And, so, the process continues. Time is wonderful on one hand. But, on the other, it is bittersweet. Nothing to permanent, either. You have something one day, the next it’s gone. That is what is crushing about time. But there is nothing we can do to stop time.

    I do not hate time, but I feel sad as it passes. At least others get the chance to explore the world and make the most of their time. But it is saddening. As people in that mid-life crisis all experience.


    You know I often think the only thing that makes life precious is the knowledge that one day it will be over.

    Just think , if you knew you would live forever what would be the incentive to get up and do anything? After all it would be there next week, next year, next century so why rush. Time would be irrelevent.

    What I do want is to get to the end of my life and be able to smile at myself and say ‘yep you did that’ rather than to look back and say ‘I wish I had done that’.

    These days I try to take advantages of anything that comes my way. I got a tattoo at 40, posed for nude photography (very arty) at 44 published my first book  about 5 years ago plus several other things that you dont get the chance of doing everyday so I didnt want to end up missing my chance to do them . No regrets is my motto.

    Time is the thing that helps us understand the preciousness of life. Dont fight it,  use it to your best advantage.


    • This reply was modified 5 months, 2 weeks ago by  cassandra.

    I was very similar Kitty in that I didn’t do as well as I should at school and later got my qualifications at college. In my case it was much later and I was in my thirties before I finished, at least except for my drawing classes which were later. I find it interesting looking back. Even though time itself has moved forward in a linear fashion I can put my main experiences into defined compartments. I have had lots of them and, although there must be some overlap, it does not seem so.

    Permanent tattoos don’t appeal to me at all Cassandra. I am unsure about nude photography but woud love a fashion shoot. Maybe it would depend on circumstance. I get very nervous but could get into cosplay and things with the right group.  I love vintage or even ancient fashions.

    1 member liked this post:

    I also find, cassandra, that I want to say “I did that” when I am old. But it is still hard – sometimes – to bite the bullet and do something. But I have written a list of my achievements and a list of what I want to achieve. It goes like this:

    What I have achieved:

    1. I got my own apartment years ago and still occupy the same one
    2. I have kept my job at the charity for over 10 years
    3. I have excellent computer skills
    4. I gained my qualifications plus attended other night classes
    5. I have better people skills than most and get along with everyone

    What I could do:

    1. Continue with my charity job as always
    2. Show people consideration when they have plans
    3. Attend an English Literature course and gain a higher qualification
    4. Go back to my social group weekly and not sparingly
    5. Go to counselling sessions and deal with my emotions that trap me

    This takes me to another subject: I made the mistake of putting the washing machine on, assuming my sister wouldn’t mind. It turns out, she did. I feel like a jerk. However, I did telephone long before lunch hour. BUT I can understand her being p*ssed off. She has every right to be. I just thought it wouldn’t matter. Again, I was wrong. I now am going to have to face someone I’ve hurt. I feel awful about myself today now. I definitely won’t put on the machine until I know my sister has other plans.

    A slightly different subject, but I feel awful about myself.

    1 member liked this post:

    Oh dear Kitty, I hope you have managed to patch things up. It’s the trouble with some of these machines that they take over. My gripe is Windows which always wants to update when I am turning off in a rush. My battery is not good now and I don’t like leaving with the power on so it usually delays me.

    Maybe you need to change some of the ‘What I could do’ to what I will do? I know from experience that could do’s often don’t happen. The best thing though is not to get stressed. With me, that’s often the time it all goes wrong.


    Thank you, SpinningJen.

    Thankfully my sister got over it and cheered up! There wasn’t a falling out. But I still feel awful and very selfish. Because I have 5 days a week: my sister only has 2 days a week. I have learnt my lesson in that regard now.

    I think you’re right: saying “What WILL I do?” rather than using the word “should” is better. Because the latter word doesn’t achieve anything. And I definitely want to live my life to the fullest. I do this by going to work every week. I am resuming my social club in a few weeks time. I cook dinner each night at my sister’s house [she lives nearby]. I keep busy, basically.

    Onwards and upwards.


    I’m sorry you had a fight with your sister Kitty … but I must admit I’m terribly confused, lol!  Why was your using the washing machine such a horrible thing?  I feel like I’m missing something 🙁

    I hate time, I feel like I’m a slave to the clock.  I don’t want to have to do things at certain times or in a certain order, I’d like to be able to set things by how I’m feeling at a given moment.  Right now it’s 3pm and I don’t feel like working, so I’m here posting.  I feel stressed by things so much because I have to be at a certain place at a certain time, and I often have things conflicting.


    That’s what I thought, Mamie! But I could understand where my sister was coming from. It was her weekend and why should she miss out on enjoying herself, going out & about? I had been very selfish. But we went out yesterday and had a great time! We aren’t going out today, as we have to start cooking dinner early. We are making Coq Au Vin. I shall be doing all the prep work.

    I love my sister’s food. We actually made this dessert yesterday: now my sister does not have a sweet tooth, but this dessert she likes. As does myself and dad. It is like Eton Mess, except it has mascapone, cherries, masala wine and biscuit crumbs. Check out the recipe cards in Waitrose and you’ll see it. Or you could Google Waitrose. If you want a great dessert, that is the one that everyone will fall in love with.


    I don’t like time all the time myself: I do feel like I’m battling the clock sometimes. Everything has to follow a routine, but it has always been like that: I just embrace it. Time does result in order and structure. But – still – it can be an ongoing battle and just gets you down. And when so much time goes, you’re left with memories and all that jazz.

    Anyhow, I think everyone battles the clock: especially as we work. But it is what it is.


    It was interesting in my last job which was very stressful. I was often given tasks to do which were impossible given other demands and my time available. I was always told – ‘Make time!’. Over the years I found the (partial) solution was to become very vague about time. When making appointments with patients, particularly those I knew well enough to know it would not inconvenience them, when practical I used to give an hours spread of the appointment time. For a minor task I would give say a day it would be completed by, not just a time I would present it. It obviously was not ideal but it relieved stress no end, and, in reality, meant I was in a better frame of mind and worked better for it. Obviously it was less easy for managerial control and toward the end of my time there things were really tightening up with everyone.


    It is interesting what you’ve said, SpinningJen: being vague about time and not making commitments out of cautiousness makes sense. Also, making time is important. Obviously, if you’re run off your feet, you can’t “make time” but you can schedule appointments in advance and organise appointments in such a way.

    I write this because I have a lot of medical appointments and keep a calendar on my computer. I don’t make appointments on days where I’m at work or doing something with a friend: I am careful, too, to not over commit myself. Being realistic about my time is invaluable.

    You’re definitely responsible and know your schedules.

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