SpinningJen

Thank you for your support, ruhaniyat: you’re right: it can come on strong some days. I suppose I have to push on: if I didn’t I would be in  a coffin. Still, having to battle anxiety is awful – which you know. Feeling fear can be cripling. Especially as it never goes away.

Thank you for your kind words and I hope you’ll carry on pushing forward…[Read more]

I must say keeping busy and active makes me happy. I just ride the anxiety and push on. Still, I will never pretend to be someone I’m not. Which leads me onto my other point: I am learning to accept myself as I am. Because I will always be this way and won’t change to please someone else. Of course I still fit in and am friendly, etc. BUT I won’t…[Read more]

I have to say I have fallen in love with my job again: I go in every week and feel better for doing so. Having a job makes you feel proud. OK, I’m not a rockstar or actress, but I love the atmosphere of my office and enjoy the work.

Anyhow, I was glad to help, sagirl.

I don’t have anything to add: I second cassandra and SpinningJen’s comments. They’ve hit the nail on the head.

You do have every right to be happy and not put up with a controlling, nasty sister. Of course, no one chooses their siblings, but you are right: you’re not 18 years old anymore. It is her loss when you’ve cut her out of your life: and I hope she sees the light when you’re gone. Or, rather, when she is gone. She will fight you – try to stop you…[Read more]

How have things panned out now? Has our advice helped clarify what’s in your mind?

I hope to hear from you: I think we would all like to know how things have progressed.

You’ve been put in an impossible situation, solly64: nothing you said or did could’ve changed the scenario. You are in no way to blame.

I also think her ex boyfriend dating her best friend just happened and was out of everybody’s control: no one chooses whom they fall for. When it comes to attraction, if two people want each other, they tend to…[Read more]

Confidence can be faked or given an impression of. But I could never even pretend to have that level of supposed confidence. Of course, I can present an image of confidence, but am unable to carry it through. I have tried to act with more assertiveness and self confidence, but when it comes to following through, I can fail.

I have come to accept…[Read more]

I’ve stuck with the same job for over 10 years: and have no plans to quit. I branched out with night classes for a few years. I also took up creative writing and have had a small success with it. BUT I do want more to achieve.

I think changing your career in your 30’s is entirely possible. If you’re unhappy, then switch jobs. Do what your heart…[Read more]

I have now sorted through my kitchen cupboards and thrown away a load of stuff. I also cleared out loads of CDs and DVDs I was never going to listen to or watch. I am really, really getting rid of items.

Welcome to Female Forum, ruhaniyat.

I have to confess, I suffer from anxiety myself. Some days it’s not so bad, other days it is worse. It goes up and down, basically.

What I do to deal with it, is have a good night’s sleep. Listen to music. Go out for a walk. Write in my diary. Telephone a friend, etc. Trying to live normally – even with anxiety – is what I do. I also eat…[Read more]

While everything I said in my initial post is true, there are times when I am not so happy. Sometimes doubts creep in and you question yourself and your choices. I am glad to do the work I do – and would not give that up for anything – but I still feel I need more in my life. I need to not duck out of the odd event and just increase confidence…[Read more]

I’m afraid I’ve only skim read your post, but let me say this: you need to get your sister out of your life. She is toxic, cruel and horrible. The fact she is your sister doesn’t excuse her behaviour. If she loves you, she has a funny way of showing it.

Don’t put up with it: get her out of your life. She’ll never change and is pure poison.

I can understand where you’re coming from, SpinningJen. I also think trying harder in relationships doesn’t mean being someone’s fool: and you’re definitely no fool. It does not mean being a martyr or sacrificing oneself. Becaue trying harder with relationships also means having self respect. Getting along with others – personally speaking – does…[Read more]

I don’t play video/computer games and never will. However, I can understand the allure. Still, that kind of activity doesn’t appeal. I do remember Monkey Island, though: my brother loved that game!

It is so, so sad. Still, I feel lucky to have made the most of the time with my night classes.

Happy memories.

Thankfully the dentist doesn’t want too white teeth. I am pleased with the results, though. I do see your point, cassandra: too white teeth can look fake and tacky. Normal white is the aim.